


paranoia, heart|beat and other nouns.

by gonefishing



Category: Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children (2016), Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children - Ransom Riggs
Genre: Angst, HollowHeart - Freeform, M/M, More Hurt Than Comfort, Romance, and other characters but mostly mentions, they might be somewhat ooc orz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-28
Updated: 2016-11-28
Packaged: 2018-09-02 15:27:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8672677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gonefishing/pseuds/gonefishing
Summary: He doesn't spy on Enoch to know what his perculiarity is, he just asks. And Enoch shows him. Afterwards Jake looks a little shocked, which makes Enoch smile. He likes people being intimidated by him. Thinking about his games, he wants to play some more. And Jacob is not like Abe at all. He doesn't judge. He does not say 'Don't'. He does not say 'This Is Not A Good Thing To Do, Enoch'. He says: "When I was younger I used to set ants on fire for fun."





	

**Author's Note:**

> alternative title: your heart, in my mouth.
> 
>  
> 
> this is a hollowheart fic. be warned, i have not read the book. i've also only seen the movie twice and i feel like i have not collected all the information that was there to collect about enoch o'connor. i feel the strong urge to write something about, for and with him anyway, so i'm just going for it. i know almost nothing about him, the place, the others, and jake in the end, so i make it all up. i also changed some things that happened differently in the movie. like the order of happenings and ehh, i call that writer's creativity. OTL  
> to get inspiration, i went for a drabble challenge with a bunch of prompts words and the ones that inspired me i used for this. so yea, enoch and jake are movie!enoch and movie!jake and whatever will happen, i blame tim burton. 
> 
> unbeta'd and english is not my first language, so i apologize, if you find mistakes, please tell me. /\
> 
> title is inspired by _paranoia, ghosts and other sounds_ by safia. if you find the time, listen to it and think of hollowheart.

i. **b e a u t y** || noun, plural "beauties": the quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations (as shape, color, sound, etc.), a meaningful design or pattern, or something else (as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest);

 

When Jacob arrives, Enoch hides behind the curtains. Everyone else thinks he's downstairs in the basement, they probably also think he's playing life and death once again, with his dolls or his figures or even with the cockroaches he's been stomping on only to resurrect them and shortly after persue them to kill one another. But no, Enoch is on the second floor, he's planed to get a cuppa, because the work he does is tiring sometimes and debating with yourself which deadly creature you could give a heart and a soul next, can be rather exhausting when you're also constantly fighting an urge to destroy everything and everyone. So Enoch is not, like everyone else thinks, ignoring them and the new arrival, he's, in fact, acknowledging it and _him_ right there and then, behind the curtains of the kitchen window and with a painted look on his face. Jacob looks just like Abe.

His statue, his hair, his features, even his way of walking resembles the person who's left them all behind. And Enoch is surprised he's feeling the same anger, after all, after all this time, for the person down there, who isn't even really the one he's actually angry at and who has no real connection with the Abe that Enoch knew. He's just his grandson. Which is a pretty strong connection, if you think about it. Enoch's angry at him, too. For coming here, for giving in, for looking at Emma the way he looks at her, just like Abe, too. Even though, right now, Jake's face mostly just shows utter confusion. He might even think he's gone crazy. Enoch likes that look. It's pleasing. There's a beauty about fear and for some reason he's always been enjoying seeing it.

Jake's overwhelmed with what he's experiencing, he's looking around, turning his head, his eyes following the curves of the wooden garden furniture on the terrace and going up to the ivy climbing up the wall of the children's and it's like he's sucking it all up. Devouring what's been there, waiting for him. _It's not like all of us have been waiting for you_ , Enoch thinks and is not fast enough. Jake's gaze lingers on the balcony for a few seconds, only to slide to the left to the open kitchen window where the curtains are drifting out, guided by the summer breeze and his eyes find Enoch's. Jake's eyes. All blue, like ever. 

Enoch hastily draws back from the window, his body shivering all over and his own heart racing on his tongue.

 

*

 

ii. **h a u n t e d** || adjective: inhabited or frequented by ghosts; preoccupied, as with an emotion, memory, or idea, obsessed; disturbed, distressed, worried;

 

His own heartbeat hits him like a memory of old times. And Enoch hides. Hides behind the towers of heads, limbs, broken smiles and no eyes. Any kind of weapon, a gun, a knive, a fork, they'll do. Anything to cut open the _I'm Sorry Enochs_ that he's burried so far beneath. But guns are forbidden in this household and Miss Peregrine disapproves his blood games. So he's left with his puppets. They will at least do anything he tells them to. They'll stay. Not like other people. They do not even listen. Not even when he asks them not to leave. 

 

*

 

iii. **m e m o r y** || noun, plural "memories": the mental capacity or faculty of retaining and reviving facts, events, impressions, etc., or of recalling or recognizing previous experiences; this faculty as possessed by a particular individual; the reputation of a person or thing, especially after death; the state or fact of being remembered; 

 

Enoch is ten again when he earns a slap by Miss Peregrine after scaring the Twins to tears with undead mice trying to eat one another, and he remembers his dad. It's not a good memory and he doesn't come out of his room for at least two days, not even when Miss Peregrine knocks softly and apologizes behind the door. The time before Miss Peregrine, the time before the children's home and the basement, a time of another basement, but of no other children; it's a time he's been swallowing whole. He comes out of his room eventually, only because his tummy's been rumbling louder than a bear's, Miss Peregrine then sits down with him for a long talk about how his favorite games might not be other children's favorites and how he should remember that fear is only a fun thing for the one who scares. Like cats and mice. She also takes his hands in hers. Her apology is not what makes him feel better, it's that she reminds him of why the times before the orphanage are over. He remembers being the mouse for a long time. But he also remembers catching one. 

 

*

iv. **e c h o** ||noun, plural "echoes": a repetition of sound produced by the reflection of sound waves from a wall, mountain, or other obstructing surface; a sound heard again near its source after being reflected; any repetition or close imitation, as of the ideas or opinions of another; a lingering trace or effect;

 

Except for the fact that his appearance resembles him a lot, Jake is nothing like Abe. He does not act as self centered, he doesn't pretend, he also has no sign of the arrogance, that Enoch's always despised. Jacob looks at him. He listens. He is even truely embarrassed when Enoch tells him not to lust after Emma. He looks honestly scared when he's told to fight. He doesn't spy on Enoch to know what his perculiarity is, he just asks. And Enoch shows him. Afterwards Jake looks a little shocked, which makes Enoch smile. He likes people being intimidated by him. Thinking about his games, he wants to play some more. And Jacob is not like Abe at all. He doesn't judge. He does not say _Don't_. He does not say _This Is Not A Good Thing To Do, Enoch_. He says: "When I was younger I used to set ants on fire for fun."

 

*

 

v. **w h i s p e r** || verb (used with or without object): to speak with soft, hushed sounds, using the breath, lips, etc., but with no vibration of the vocal cords; (phonetics)to produce utterance substituting breath for phonation; to talk softly and privately (often implying gossip, slander, plotting, or the like); 

 

"So you killed," Enoch says with a thrilled voice. "Anything else you did?"

 Jake looks at him for a second as if he's considering Enoch's words and as if he wants to disagree, but then shrugs. "Tried to flood a nest of wasps with white wine once. My mom didn't find that very amusing. Don't know which part shocked her more, though."

Enoch chuckles. He looks very amused by Jake's story and there's this glow in his pupils that Jake's never seen before. He does not want it to go away.

For another second it seems like Enoch's about to tell him something, but then he just looks at him. "Go on," he says with sparkling eyes.

"My mom grounded me for two weeks after that. I didn't dare to do it again," he mumbles and lets his gaze wander across the room. The basement is Enoch's space, he knows. Olive told him that Enoch likes to play dirty games. Not-nice games. Bully games. She also told him that Enoch hides from the world. And that he, at the same time, wants to go out and let everyone look at him, cheer for him, cherish him. But that he can't. Because other monsters than the Hollowgasts exist.

He lets his eyes favour everything he sees, bodies, the unfinished ones and the ones that have been destroyed by other forces, the table with the sewing machine and needles all over the place, the furniture that seems to have had better days. There're some bread crumbles on the sofa, one that looks like Enoch spends some nights there. There's a blanket thrown over a chair nearby. There're dirty tea cups on the ground, kettled in by one another. There're also pictures on the wall, but Jake's not close enough to see what's in them. There're sketches of puppets-to-be. There's a lot of Enoch in here. Jake swallows. He devours it all, like always.

"Expected nothing else from you, to be honest, Mr. Ordinary," Enoch suddenly sneers.

Jake's dares to look him in the eyes again.

Enoch looks slightly disappointed. His mouth mimics a bitter grin. The happiness in his voice and the glow in his eyes from earlier have vanished completely. What's left is probably what Olive meant. He kicks a doll's head under the chair. And Jake's eyes wander again. Across Enoch's face and down to his adam's apple. It bounces. His colarbone shows, because his shirt is not fully buttoned. His legs seem scraggy. Enoch has his hands losely at his sides, but stares him right in the eyes. Jake shivers and steps closer.

He's a little taller than Enoch. Only one or two centimeters. Standing in front of him their eyes are on even levels. Enoch still glares, even though an even more irritated touch lingers in his gaze now. The older boy doesn't back away from him. The light is too dim to actually see a lot, it's noon and the basement's windows are dirty, making it almost dark in the small room, even in daylight.

"I didn't dare to do it again. Doesn't mean I didn't want to," Jake mumbles next to Enoch's cheek.

And it's at least bright enough to see the corners of Enoch's mouth twitch.

 

*

 

vi. **j e a l o u s y** || noun, plural "jealousies": jealous resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantage itself; vigilance in maintaining or guarding something; mental uneasiness from suspicion or fear of rivalry, unfaithfulness, etc., as in love or aims;

 

Jake tells Emma about his world. He tells fairy tale like stories about how mankind stepped on the moon. How phones are now mobile and take pictures. How there's this huge invisible way of connecting with people all around the world called _wifi_. And that the president of the United States is black and a few ones of other countries female.

He tells her about how you're able to fly to China in less than 12 hours. And how you're able to watch a bunch of movies on your own little screen while doing so. How you're legally allowed to change your gender and how there're things like _microwave cupcakes_ that don't need actual flour nor an actual oven. And that the most used word of 2013 was _Selfie_. Whatever that means.

Miss Peregrine forbits talks about the future on the dinner table, but Emma's eyes are glued on Jake talking and they shine. Whatever he says she's glowing for him. Across the table, Enoch clenches his fist around the fork. He has stories to tell, too and he would tell them, if they'd ask for him to tell. He tells Claire bedtime stories or makes the Twins giggle when he gives their teddy bear the ability to foxtrot before crawling between them and the bed sheets. The worst part of envying Jake for telling is not that he tells, and in the end also not that they ask. After all it is what he has to tell and that he tells bright-eyed, as if he can't believe people actually wanting to talk to him. Considering all these experience it seems unbelievable that Jacob had the _most boring and ordinary childhood ever_ , as he calls it. Enoch remembers Abe and he suddenly wants to lock Jake in the basement and keep him from talking to Emma ever again. Let him tell these stories only to him.

He can see Olive smiling her empathetic smile next to him and she lets her fingers slide over his. It is as if she's telling him not to worry. _You're special enough, Enoch. You'll see._

But Enoch doesn't see and neither does Jacob, not until Victor cries with empty orbits. 

 

*

 

vii. **p o s s e s s i v e** ||adjective: jealously opposed to the personal independence of, or to any influence other than one's own upon, a child, spouse, etc.; desirous of possessing, especially excessively; of or relating to possession or ownership;

 

"He's possessive," Emma says and means Enoch. 

Jacob's not sure he knows what she's refering to, although after a moment of thinking he then knows he does. He remembers sitting across Enoch at the dinner table, focusing on his own plate so that he hasn't have to look up and meet Enoch's eyes. Because everything, anything really, that Enoch looks at and lately especially Jake himself, he sucks up with dilated pupils that reflect nothing else but _want_. Enoch's possessive. Of a lot of things. It seems, of people, too. Lately Jacob's lost track of how many days he's spend with them and finds it hard not to feel attached. It's harder to feel connected to Enoch though, because of who he is, because Enoch is constantly angry at him and because Enoch was most likely in love with Abe. 

It makes sense. And _Olive can marry him for all I care._ or _You see, that's why he won't stay with us._ become more real when Jacob starts to really wonder if what Emma says was true. There seems to be an expression imprinted on Enoch's face whenever he speaks with a tinted voice. Tiding with it the stripped truth of naked longing for something that seems painted with what could be the loss of another time. A time before Jacob was around. Jacob doesn't dare to look him in the eye when there's nothing else shown than clear desire for something Jacob doesn't know how to define, much less to give. 

Emma shrugs, when Jacob asks if she and Enoch are close. "Lately he's closer to Olive," she murmurs and hands him the end of a robe. "I guess they bond over shared want for blight. Remember not to let go," she says with a wink. "Who knows where I'd end up." 

And Jacob wants, too. 

 

*

 

viii. **w a n d e r** || verb (used without object): to ramble without a definite purpose or objective; roam, rove, or stray; to wander over the earth; to go aimlessly, indirectly, or casually; (of the mind, thoughts, desires, etc.) to take one direction or another without conscious intent or control;

 

Victor's mind wanders. Not to where his body lays. To places far away from Wales, those that do not even exist, although for Victor, they do. He travels back in time to see his sister smile and to witness epic battles.

Still, even if there's Enoch and his laughter to hear and even if it travels across his chest and into his chest, his lungs and the space where his heart used to be, Victor knows he's only a wanderer. That the pure bliss of hearing Enoch truely laugh is not really here and neither is Enoch. Or the places he always goes back to.

He can feel someone opening his ripcage and putting something there, something that isn't supposed to be there and it rips him from even what the thing that killed him has left behind. It cages his inner wanderer and replaces him with utter submission and _how could you, Enoch?_

He knows what it is and he can hear the boy next to his bed gasp in horror as his own limb body moves on it's own, lifted up from the mattress by an invisible force, his eyelids wide open, dark and hollow.

When Enoch's done playing, he doesn't even tuck him in properly, he only takes out what has abused and leaves. It hurts like nothing else has ever hurt before.

The boy is shaking, Enoch is pleased and Victor is left devastated.

 

*

 

ix. **f a d e d** || verb (used without object) "fade, fading": to lose brightness or vividness of color; to become dim, as light, or lose brightness of illumination; to lose freshness, vigor, strength, or health; to disappear or die gradually (often followed by away or out);

 

Jake's occupied with his own thoughts up until later that evening when he sits across Enoch on the sofa for that day's movie. Emma and Olive have taken the rest of the children to brush their teeth so that after the movie's come to an end and the loop's been reset, they can tuck them right into bed.

"How could you do that?" Jake says later that evening and he asks with no warmth in his voice. He's wanted to know Enoch, he really did. But Enoch's actions are too destructive, even for him. Enoch just looks at him and then shrugs. "He's dead. He won't mind."

"You don't know that," Jacob huffs and feels breathless for a second. Enoch narrows his eyes to slits.

"I do actually. I'm a necromancer in case you've forgotten. I cheat death. I understand the dead. I am their _master_ ," He almost spits out as he leans forward to stare at Jake with fire behind his face.

"You're not a necromancer, Enoch. You're a reviver. You don't cheat death, you give life." Intimidated by Enoch's action Jake leans forward as well and they find themselves eye to eye once again. Not much distance between their faces.

"You don't understand me at all. You might think of it that way, but this is not who I am. I don't revive, I re _use_. I don't free them, I cage them and they do _whatever_ I want," Enoch whispers and he's close enough for Jake to feel his breath. It's warm. And Jacob just then realises how close they are. Like a frightened rabbit he jerks back, against the reassuring backrest of the sofa. Enoch nearly smirkes.

"You think you understand us, Jacob. But you don't. What you think is not necessarily what you see and vice versa. We're not all good, peace and purity like Emma is," Enoch says, more calm now, but his eyes aren't smiling at all.

Jacob swallows. "I know that. And I don't mind. I want to understand you nonetheless, Enoch," he mutters defeatedly, because Enoch is right about at least that last part. "I might not understand why you do what you do, but I want you to share it with me. I want to get to know you better. And I want _you_ to tell me, not Emma." Just as the words have left his mouth, Jake feels embarrassed of them and how they've sounded. He's not sure he's even been wanting to express his offer of friendship to Enoch like this. The carpet suddenly seems way more interesting than ever before.

Enoch is quiet now and Jake lets his eyes flicker up to find his. And just like they always do, from across the dinner table, when he's shown Jacob how he pursues spiritless puppets into battles of life and death, from behind the curtains of the second floor and behind leathered gas masks right before an explosion that never arrives; their gazes intertwine. Enoch's finding his. Only that this time it's not because of envy. Jacob smiles a small, shy smile.

Finally, Enoch's eyes are calm now, too. 

 

*

 

x. **h o l l o w** ||adjective "hollower, hollowest": having a space or cavity inside; not solid; empty; having a depression or concavity; sunken, as the cheeks or eyes; (of sound) not resonant; dull, muffled, or deep; without real or significant worth; meaningless; insincere or false; hungry; having an empty feeling;

 

They remain calm. At first.

Enoch hides less, but fears more and it's very new all in all. But Jacob gives him time and space and it's almost a bliss. The memory of Abraham gets blurred by Jacob telling Enoch to not only use his puppets for war, but for little missions like delivering little letters to Bronwyn or Fiona. Jacob's only started to sometimes just appear in the doorway of the basement to spend some time with Enoch when the other's working on another of his stitched mysteries, when Emma shows him the Hollow.

Jake knows without asking that it's Victor's reaper. And Abe's as well.

He screams at Miss Peregrine after that for keeping secrets and it angers Enoch to a point where he forgets that Jacob's been different from anything Abe's ever been like and only wants him to shut the fuck up. It's not like anyone in this household would ever enjoy the priviledge of Miss Peregrine telling them details. So why should Jacob have it.

His eyes are burning like a campfire when he grabs Enoch by the collar after he just couldn't hold back anymore and Enoch hasn't expected it but _It's not like you want me here!_ actually surprises him. Because, after all, time's been running forward even though it hasn't really but Enoch likes to think it has. Which makes it even harder to accept Jacob's constant demanding.

But how do you explain to someone who's purpose is not to figure out another boy's emotional state but to take revenge on what's responsibile for the death of the most important person in their life, that your feelings for remorse are pretty much dislocated and your ability to feel empathy has been dissolved in the years of an infinite youth close to immortality, but with the constant possibility of another, maybe your own, sudden death?

You don't. Because, a long time ago, you've also forgotten how to say _Sorry_ and mean it.

 

*

 

xi. **s u b t l e** || adjective, "subtler, subtlest": thin, tenuous, or rarefied, as a fluid or an odor; fine or delicate in meaning or intent; difficult to perceive or understand; delicate or faint and mysterious; requiring mental acuteness, penetration, or discernment;

 

Death had always been Enoch's friend, a companion, an endurer. He's never doubted him, never betrayed.

Still, not even Death can obliterate his mind now, not when Miss Peregrine - the closest person to a mother that Enoch possibly ever had - is most likely already dead. This is when Enoch begins to falter. He's never spend a minute of his endless childhood to think about what'd happen if she'd leave them. He's never given enough as repayment to her than he should've.

It seems impossible to imagine Miss Peregrine dead, because it's just not something she'd do, that she'd ever allow to happen to her. Miss Peregrine is too much in love with life and too much of a bird not to fly. Even if, and he seriously doubts it, something like heaven exists, Enoch's sure she'd be bored to death there.

The house is destroyed now and with their winged protector gone, there's not much more left. In silent ignorance towards the earlier terror, the beach is peaceful and the tide caresses Enoch's toes. Jacob has Emma to his side and doesn't let go of her hand. Enoch wishes he wouldn't let go of his either. It's Olive, who makes sure that he doesn't get lost.

They're exhausted and the small ones need a rest before continuing to go after Barron and the taken Ymbryne. Jacob tells them about a cave, Fiona collects some wood to create a bonfire together with Olive to warm them all up. The Twins curl up against Enoch, one on each side and Bronwyn requests his hand to help her fall asleep. He can see the surprise in Jacob's eyes as he guides them to rest, only to get up when they do and flee from those eyes, out of the cave, to the shore.

Jacob is careful as he follows.

Enoch stares across the sea towards the horizon and only turns to Jake when their shoulders touch. Jacob is as speechless as Enoch is, but then they're not really in need for words right now anyways.

"You know, I won't leave you behind, right?" Jake says after a few long moments and puts emphasy on every letter. Their last fight is now in the past as well. Enoch's heart is in his mouth as he decides to just go for it and take Jacob's hand in his. He doesn't shy away. In fact, Jacob smiles one of his surprised and slightely embarrassed smiles.

Enoch knows whatever Jake says will not make him stay if there's a chance that Abe might live. But missing people has never been something Enoch'd allow himself to turn to. He's seen Emma's heart being ripped apart after Abe left and it's never been fair, because Abe didn't just leave her, he had left them all. But something as pure and frightening as the stage of mind in which you allow the feeling of attachement to occupy too much space, can ruin you and Enoch's mind is already pretty depraved.

So, missing Jacob is not an option.

Enoch's been a boy too long to feel attacted to his own youth, but now, as he faces the eventual end of his own existence, it scares the hell out of him. If there'd just be more to this boy who is so chaste and uncorrupted to the core, Enoch'd give himself up to be able to absorb it before it all ends, but his life has never been kind to him. Only long.

 

*

 

xii. **i n t e n s e** || adjective: existing or occurring in a high or extreme degree; acute, strong, or vehement, as sensations, feelings, or emotions; of an extreme kind; very great, as in strength, keenness, severity, or the like; having a characteristic quality in a high degree; susceptible to strong emotion; emotional; (of color) very deep;

 

The ship is so old and rusty. It's been in the dark for too long. It rises from the bottom of the ocean because of Emma's air, she drys it and makes it carry them and Olive gives it the power to function, heating the engines. But the ship's also not breaking apart because of it's will now. Enoch gives a soul and a heart to it, he gives it all his best, because Jake's plan has to work, otherwise they're all doomed. The Twins cheer for him, Olive gasps in amazement, and Jacob locks his gaze with his. He smiles a wide smile. _Reviver_ he mouths. His eyes are shining only for Enoch. And for Enoch it's bittersweet.

 

*

 

xiii. **f a l l i n g** || verb (used without object) "fell, fallen, falling": to drop or descend under the force of gravity, as to a lower place through loss or lack of support; to come or drop down suddenly to a lower position, especially to leave a standing or erect position suddenly, whether voluntarily or not; to lose status, dignity, position, character, etc.;

 

Sometimes liking someone else is surely something that hits unconsciously and you're only able to notice you're in too deep when it's already too late to escape. Enoch knows he likes Jake in a way he wasn't supposed to, but right now, he doesn't have the time to worry about it. They're fighting against monsters after all.

He kisses Olive out of love and friendship for her, because she's really been a saviour more than once for him and she really deserves so much better. But then she hasn't died and she understands, of course she does, that he loves her but not _love_ loves her. But that she still means the world to him.

His sarcasm saves him from overreacting, since falling for someone isn't really what he's been done often before and it sure as hell isn't as easy as to give in to paranoia and hide. There's nowhere to hide right now anyways.

As the last standing Hollow is thrown over the balustrade, Enoch and Jacob both run to the edge. Jake's fingers are around Enoch's as he drags him back into the haunted house while he hastily explains the next steps. Rescue Miss Peregrine. Get rid of Mr. Barron. Hide the smallest ones. Find Olive and ask her to warm up Bronwyn, Olive- And Jake cuts off, looking at Enoch, his face unreadable.

"This is not the right time, I know. I just- I want to say I'm happy for you guys. You deserve it," He says with an artificial smile, squeezing Enoch's hand. "I saw you wake her up."

It hits Enoch then, and he's actually about to laugh, about to tell Jacob that he's an idiot, when the other turns around to repay whatever he thinks he ows them, but for once Enoch's brave enough not to let go.

"I'm not- We're not-" It's so hard to focus when you practically wear your own heart on your sleeve. "It wasn't like that," he says, looking at the other's surprise and his own astonishment fills his inner wounds. He squeezes Jake's fingers back. 

 

*

 

xiv. **a b e** || --

 

Enoch's glad Jacob is not like Abe after all. Abe probably wouldn't have missed with all these arrows. Abe also wouldn't have given Emma the chance to fight, always overprotective and arrogant Abe would've acted as the hero of the day. Enoch is even glad that Jacob does not know how to find actual convincing arguments that he's the real Jake and just stutters, staring widely eyed at the other Jake alias Mr. Barron, who's time in pretence of being a psychiatrist have finally come to use, as he rambles on. All of it is worth the fact that Barron becomes the prey of his own monster and that Jacob lives.

With Barron's death Enoch also feels like something's been lifted up from where his heart pounds and he knows whatever's left of Abe inside of him is saying goodbye.

As is Victor.

As is Jacob.

He can't blame him for it, really, but he also doesn't find the strength not to feel crestfallen. All he feels is empty.

"Sorry," Jacob says as he wavers slightely before the shuffles near him so that he stands right behind him. "I said I would-- But I really-- I really wanna see my grandpa, Enoch. I'm sorry. Really."

"It's fine. You choose your _actual_ family over us, that's perfectly understandable," Enoch's mouth deadpants without permission.

"I don't choose him _over_ you," Jacob objects and isn't sure if he means them all or just Enoch, and he hesitates when he sees the look on Enoch's face as he turns to him. "I just have to go see him. I really miss him."

"We all do," Enoch says, breaks their eye contact and holds out his hand. The loop closed when he steps through the door. And Jacob is gone, and with him the yearning for something more than resurrection. The feeling of Jacob's hand in his is still lingering. It's warm. Enoch turns to see Miss Peregrine rise into the clouds.

Jacob slowly slides down on the stairs, his body and heart feeling limb and for some reason his eyes are burning. He stares into the sky.

He knows that in any moment, in 1943, the ship is taking off.

In the next moment, Jacob runs.

 

*

 

xv. **l i n g e r** ||verb (used with or without object): to remain (alive); continue or persist, although gradually dying, ceasing, disappearing, etc.; to dwell in contemplation, thought, or enjoyment; to remain or stay on in a place longer than is usual or expected, as if from reluctance to leave;

 

Emma cries when Jacob barges in on them, out of breath, his hair in his neck longer, skin tanned, in his eyes the sparkle of a journey. She embraces him tight as he recites how he made it back, chuckling as the Twins tumble on their way to hug his waist, smiling his widest smile as his eyes find Enoch's.

Olive releases Enoch's fingers and suddenly Jake's around him, vibrating and breathing and laughing.

Jake's cheek touches his, he feels fingertips caressing the soft spot behind his ears and he finds himself inhaling Jacob's scent, because his face is hot and he huddles it against Jake's damp hoodie.

"Honestly," Enoch mumbles against the fabric, "I'm hardly anything but a psychopath. And you're a loser. We'll hardly make a good twosome."

He feels Jacob pull him closer. "You're not a psychopath, Enoch," he says and kisses his temple. "You're amazing. I'd give you my heart for free."

Enoch wants to draw back to eye him with annoyance, but his cheeks burn and it's hard to hide it when your face is pressed against another one.

In the darkness, Jake's eyes smile.


End file.
